Funnybook Babylon

June 17, 2008

Final Cluster@#*!: DC Comics is Like a Videogame Boss Where You Blow Up The CPU and Then Every Other Part Functions Independently With No Teamwork

Filed under: Blurbs — David Uzumeri @ 1:59 pm

And we’re gonna go yet another round in the “What the fuck is going on at DC” sweepstakes, thanks to Warren Ellis’s latest Bad Signal (stolen from Schwapp!!!):

People like talking shit about Dan Didio online. The truth is that he’s actually a smart guy who, on entering the company, had to make some tough decisions fairly quickly. It’s also true that some lifers at DC editorial are very resistant to any kind of change. Are some of them just plain nasty and dumb enough to say, “screw Morrison, we’ll do our own story, and if it blows his big reveals, well, fuck ‘im”? I would hope not, but it does seem to have happened anyway.

Aw, shit. I was wondering why Death of the New Gods #5 was so revelatory.

For those of you who missed my original article about it, see here. Basically, in DONG5, Starlin said that the Source was behind killing the New Gods, and the creation of the 52 worlds, and all of that crap. This always seemed like a hell of a plot point to drop there, so at NYCC I asked Geoff Johns if he wrote Infinite Crisis with DONG5’s retcons in mind. He quickly said he didn’t know what I meant and wasn’t caught up and couldn’t answer. I thought that was pretty damn weird, and judging by Ellis’s comments, I was right.

So – putting the pieces together – Morrison’s stated before that the villain of Final Crisis won’t be obvious, and won’t be revealed until the last issue. Within the framework of Final Crisis alone as we know it so far, the Source isn’t an obvious villain. So let’s take a look at the history of blowing secrets over the course of this project: Jim Starlin’s New God-killer, Infinity-Man, had his identity blown by a silhouette in Bedard’s first issue of Birds of Prey. Then, Jim Starlin blew the even BIGGER villain of Morrison’s Final Crisis months in advance by, uh, giving him a motherfucking Bond Villain Speech months before the miniseries even started. Wow.

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON AT 1700 BROADWAY? Do Marts and Berganza just hate each other? Did Didio know this was going on? Does anyone read all their comics? How does Ian Sattler still have a job? Will Geoff Johns take me up on my pony keg offer? Did, as Huxford seems to think (but then again Huxford is like the comics blogging equivalent of Mel Gibson in Conspiracy Theory), Carlin sabotage all of this? With all this lead time, why does the book need Carlos Pacheco? Can’t the Marvel offices just work three days a week and still win? Tune in next time, in DC Publicly Falls Apart.


  1. I would actually not be surprised if no one read all their DCU books/

    Comment by EndlessMike — June 17, 2008 @ 2:11 pm

  2. Excellent point about Ian Sattler. My impression from the various DC Nation columns in which he featured was that he was the “continuity cop” at DC. If that’s true, he’s sorta the continuity cop equivalent of Gunther Toody from Car 54, Where Are You?

    Comment by Matt — June 17, 2008 @ 3:33 pm

  3. I dunno. From everything I’ve read, DiDio sounds like he’s both smart and nice, but has run up against a lot of very entrenched people and he isn’t successfully navigating them to make his plans come together. I think he receives the lion’s share of the blame because he’s the most public, but I just can’t see how all of this can be his fault. I think he just has a *really* tough job made tougher by a culture change that would be tough for anyone to adapt to.

    I don’t even think Jim Shooter could be successful in this environment. (Insert your favorite editor in chief there.)

    Comment by Kenny — June 17, 2008 @ 9:37 pm

  4. “Screw Morrison, we’ll do our own story, and if it blows his big reveals, well, fuck ‘im”! Hey, didn’t i use to be the Editor in Chief at DC? Do you think holding Paul Dini’s hand while he shovels out Countdown leaving me to answer questions about it on Newsarama has made me bitter?

    Comment by "Mike Carlin" — June 18, 2008 @ 8:54 am

  5. Re a “culture change”, isn’t it possible he’s been working toward a culture where he basically ghost-writes all the books and micromanages everything? It sure looks that way from the outside. If that’s because everyone else at DC is a doofus then so be it, but I have a hard time believing that’s the case.

    It looks more to me like Didio is running off and/or alienating lots of good people. The view of a company from outside is always incomplete, but at least from that perspective DC looks pretty badly mismanaged right now.

    Comment by matches — June 18, 2008 @ 9:47 am

  6. More fuel for the fire:

    “But who would that new guy be? The loudest buzz is around Jimmy Palmiotti, currently under an exclusive contract as a writer for DC Comics, but whose previous positions include co-founding Event Comics and co-head of Marvel’s “Marvel Knights” imprint, both with friend and current Marvel Editor-in-Chief Joe Quesada.”

    Comment by Crusader — June 18, 2008 @ 9:57 am

  7. “Smart guy”- oh, Warren, you’re just saying that to tweak the fanboys, aren’t you? If he was really smart he would have gotten the fuck out of there a year ago.

    Comment by Dan Coyle — June 19, 2008 @ 12:23 pm

  8. Heh…sadly, that Mel Gibson comparison is probably the nicest thing that has been said about me this week. ;) I just think that Carlin best fits the Warren Ellis profile of an old guard guy at DC who would fight tooth and nail against change instituted by Didio.

    Comment by Kevin Huxford — June 19, 2008 @ 6:18 pm

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